Scent of a Boomer
by RoachGuy
Summary: A side story to Maxwell Sinclair's fic "How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Boomer" This is my point of view of the events in the fic. Enjoy!
1. I'm Friggin' Awesome

**Scent of a Boomer**

A How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Boomer Side Story

By Roachguy

_Original Story by Maxwell Sinclair_

Chapter 1

I'm Friggin' Awesome

The first thing I noticed was my ass was cold.

In the background I could hear computers running and occasionally beeping. 'I'm not dead?' was the first thought that passed through my head. Well, that and my ass was cold.

When I finally got the nerve up to open my eyes I was surprised that they needed no time to focus. This was especially odd since I have always worn glasses.

When I looked around the room I noticed it was empty save a computer on the back wall and one next to me that I was plugged into. I sat up and started looking around more. The computer next to me seemed to be monitoring my vitals. I was alive if I was reading it right and that's a good start.

When I tried to focus on the computer on the wall I was surprised when my eyes seemed to "zoom in" and I could read it as if I was standing in front of it. On the screen was something almost like a blue print...of a freaking robot. 'Dude' was the only thought that I could manage.

Having seen enough sci-fi and anime in my time I had a pretty good idea what had happened. I was a freaking robot. I looked closer at the image I was a... I blinked twice. "A BOOMER?!"

To say that this is every sci-fi geek's wet dream is an understatement. I went to Japan died in a earthquake and got turned into a robot. To test my theory I punched the computer next to me as hard as I could. I went slack jawed as it flew across the room and into the wall where it broke apart into hundreds of beautiful 'I'm a robot' pieces.

I thought about the implications of these turns of events for about half a second before hopping off the bed and beginning my quest for some clothes. I went to the door and tried the handle; it was unlocked. Too bad, because I would have liked to have knocked it down. 'Oh what the hell' I thought before kicking the door down. It didn't go quite as far as I thought it would but oh well, at least it went down.

Outside of the room seemed way less impressive. It seemed to be nothing more then an abandoned building.

'Cool', I thought 'I bet this means I'm all advanced and top secret' my geek-gazm was about to fill my shorts, or it would have had I been wearing any. Much to my surprise there was a set of clothes next to the door along with some boots and a freaking sweet looking gun. "This is going to be fun."

Somewhere someone is watching these events unfold on a small screen, "Oh, you have no idea..."

For nearly a week now I had wandered the barren landscape of what was once Tokyo, apparently it had gotten p'owned.

That didn't really bother me that much because now I knew I was in an anime, but what did bother me is I was an advanced super boomer that didn't come with GPS and I was lost. This in itself wouldn't have been all that bad had there been something to do, but there was nothing. Not even a puppy to kick.

On the eighth day of my walkabout (which is what I will call it, so it doesn't sound like I was completely lost) I ran into my first batch of fun; boomer testing.

They appeared to be nothing more then your average boomer with some slight modifications; mainly they seemed bigger. There where three of them.

I was shocked at how far away they where when I noticed them. It was easily a mile away. I took my time getting to where they where testing, so as not to reveal myself to them until it was time to kick there blue asses.

I was able to get within twenty yards of them before I was noticed. And even then they didn't seem too interested. I would have to do something about that.

I pulled out the gun I had found and fired in the general direction of the boomers. I was only trying to get there attention, and boy did I get it. One of the boomer's heads exploded. I laughed for a second before I stopped myself. The other two boomers charged at me.

'Crap' was my next thought as they where almost on top of me. I fired the gun again this time hitting one of them in the chest. It left a very large hole there. As I admired my handy work I was hit in the head by the other boomer. It hurt...bad.

The boomer then picked me up by the neck and pulled his arm back to punch me but his arm flew apart at the elbow right before he could take my head off. I looked over to the side and saw a large AD Police truck with several "SWAT" types pointing guns at the boomer.

I took this opportunity to kick the boomer with both legs and all my strength. This was apparently harder then I thought because the boomer's top half flew away while its remaining arm and legs stayed where they where. I managed to land quite gracefully on my ass. The boomer appeared to be dead.

I looked over to where the AD Police were and they pointed there guns at me. I gave a weak smile.

"Do you know how to get to Mega-Tokyo?" I asked trying my best to seem innocent. I saw several of the younger officers face fault slightly behind there rifles.

The senior officers seemed a little put-off by my comment and started talking over there radios. I heard them say something about illegal testing and another boomer. I decided to play dumb.

I looked at one officer it was a female (quite cute from where I was sitting) and asked, "Whats a boomer?" It got the response I wanted. Her gun fell slightly and a slightly surprised look fell over her features. "Was that robot a boomer?" I asked again. Then I scratched the back of my head "It was pretty poorly made, one kick and it fell apart." I then tilted my head "Was it yours? You guys aren't mad at me for breaking it are you?" several more of the officers started to lower their weapons.

One of the older officers, the one I thought might be in command, walked out a few steps and started talking. "Lower your weapons. We are taking this one in." He looked at me and snarled slightly, "The first sign of trouble I want it destroyed."

"Am I under arrest or something?"

"Something like that," was the only response I got.

'Oh well', I thought, 'at least I will get out of this place.'

TBC...

next time: I get paid for this?

AN: I know this was a bit short I plan on the next chapter to be much longer. This chapter was to set up what kind of character my SI was going to be. I like the way it's started and hopefully I will be able to keep up a good pace with this story. Also my other fic should be updated within the next 2 or 3 weeks by that time there should be at least one more chapter of this fic out as well. As always C&C are welcome.

Thanks goes to Maxwell Sinclair for proof reading and editing.


	2. I Get Paid For This? pt1

**Scent of a Boomer**

A How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Boomer Side Story

By Roachguy

_original story by Maxwell Sinclair_

**Chapter 2  
I Get Paid for This? part 1**

The ride out of old Tokyo was pretty long. As it turned out my 'captors' had only been out on a routine patrol of the former capitol city when they had noticed me attacking the boomers. You would think they would be more grateful to me for doing their job. No one would talk to me except the one female officer from earlier. I knew all about AD Police, I had seen the show. She wanted my robot cock I'm sure.

She was very soft spoken which kind of threw me off it was almost as if Kasumi Tendo or Belldandy became a cop. "...so thats what happened," I finished my tale of when I first awoke in the room up till when they found me. I said nothing of my past life. I would have to use that story later for plot purposes.

"Thats so strange...um, what should I call you?" she asked

"Call me?" I thought about it for a long second "well Roach seems to sound right to me. Kind of a strange name though."

"Roach? Well that is... unique. My name is Niki, I just joined the force a few months ago." She gave me a smile and only one thought went threw my head, 'She can have my robot cock'. I heard a few of the other cops muttering among them selves about Niki and the boomer.

I glared at one of them, it was the older guy that had given the order to arrest me. He had a long scar going down his face it started above his hair line and went down across his left eye and down to his chin. His comments about Niki where very vulgar. I grinned slightly at him. "Whats wrong, scarface? She won't give you the time of day?" the fucker shot me... didn't even blink, just shot me. The bullet didn't do any damage it had hit me dead in the chest though. "YOU SHIT!" I yelled. Niki had fallen out of her seat, next to mine, and she looked panicked.

"Watch your mouth boomer! I would destroy you here if it weren't for my orders from the top." Odds are though the higher ups in the force wanted to take custody of me because of some Genom protocol to ensure boomers like me don't go around causing trouble. If my guess is right, Genom doesn't even know I exist.

I grinned at him again and brushed the spot where he had shot me. "And I would kill you right now if I wasn't so damn lost." I took this opportunity to look down at Niki who had turned white as a ghost and was looking at me shaking her head.

"Don't," she said.

Shit I had probably just made things worse for her. I looked at the man who had shot me and rolled my eyes. "Let me guess. You and your partner where out on routine potrol and ran into a boomer. He killed your partner and scared your face before escaping into the night. You now hate all boomers and anyone who associates with them." I saw his face fall slightly before he holstered his gun and he looked away. "Right on the head then?" I asked no one in particular. Niki sat back down only this time she didn't look at me and made no attempt at talking. 'Shit', I thought, 'she was a hottie too'.

The rest of the ride was very quiet no one talked the only sounds where from the car, the road, and the occasional chatter of a radio.

When we arrived at are destination in the heart of Mega Tokyo I was becoming anxious. I kept thinking I should have kept my mouth shut and not doing so would come back and bite me in the ass big time.

I was pushed out of the truck by 'Scarface' I wondered how much trouble I would get into for killing him. I let the thought go, though. I looked at the building in front of me and was impressed by the size of it. The anime did no justice to the AD Police headquarters.

I was brought inside and placed in a special boomer holding cell. I thought about the past week and a half and got a little depressed. 'Man', I thought, 'things are getting weird ... I got turned into a robot, I got arrested by the AD Police, met a hot chick that I totally ruined any chances with, I got shot, and now I'm in this tiny cell. Shit... at least I'm not lost anymore.'

To my surprise the first person to come see me was Niki she peeked through the small window on the door and began talking to me. The door, however, made it almost impossible to hear. Or it would have if I hadn't been a boomer.

"Thank you," she said, "no one has ever stood up for me. I feel so stupid you stood up for me and I stopped talking to you... it's just Drake is my boss and... well he's complicated. I just wanted to come by and tell you that." With that she left.

Heh, she still wanted my robotic member.

I was left in the cell all night I think it was to see if I would try and escape. I slept like a baby that night.

The next morning I awoke with several armed guards in the room and one man in a suit. "Mr. Roach", he began, "I have an offer you can refuse"

"I want you to join us. In Branch we have jobs suited to your unique... abilities. The scans we performed on your body last night where very enlightening. You are unlike any boomer we have ever encountered. Your cyberbrain is unlike anything ever imagined. You could go places with us. Wou could save hundreds, if not thousands, of people with your abilities and we can't let that go to waste."

'Cyberbrain', I thought, 'That means I'm 100 boomer...' I thought about this for a few minutes while the man in the suit stood there awaiting my answer. 'Lets see I'm a robot...Death to the humans?' I grinned at him, "Sure, I'll join branch but I want an officer named Niki to be transfered to you as well."

"I'm sure the arrangements can be made Mr. Roach... So is that a yes?"

I nodded.

He stood up and came over and stuck his hand out, I took it and shook his hand. He had an amazing grip.

TBC...

I Get Paid For This? Part 2

Gonna make this in to a 2 parter just because I can. I know this chapter wasn't as funny as last. The humor will be picking up again, next time. Also, if you haven't read Max's story I recommend it. It will not be necessary to read it to understand this story, but it will help.


	3. I Get Paid For This? pt2

**Scent of a Boomer**

A **How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Boomer** Side Story

By Roachguy

_original story by Maxwell Sinclair_

**Chapter 3  
I Get Paid For This? part 2**

I have been working here at Branch now for nearly a month and a half. It was a learning experience for me. While before I had been turned into a boomer I had worked some small security jobs, the things I had to do as a officer for Branch where like nothing I had ever experienced. But I didn't have to go through these learning experiences alone. Niki had been transferred just like I had asked. This had pissed off Drake and I had enjoyed seeing him lose it on some poor rookie. Poor guy, wrong place at the right time. At least he still had some of his original teeth.

After her transfer, her and I had started becoming close and had even gone on a few dates. I thought it was odd that she had such a thing for me. But who am I to complain? She had taken to the job much better then I had. She knew how to follow rules and authority. Me on the other hand I knew how to shoot stuff and make it blow up. Which, might I add, is a very good skill to have in this kind of work.

We where currently about to go on a call and where suiting up when one of the other officers came up to me and started talking. "Hey Roach, I heard you and Niki went out again last night after work."

I looked at him and gave him a nod and a look that should have told him to watch his words.

Apparently, he didn't get the hint and continued, "Is it true what they say about the quiet ones? Is she wild in the sack? I bet shes a screamer, man, you got to tell me. Me and a couple of the other guys got this bet goi..." It's hard for anyone to talk when being choked. It's even harder if the one doing the choking is a super advanced robot holding you a foot off the ground with one hand.

I looked him in the eyes and squeezed a little tighter. "You will not talk about Niki like that, and you won't talk to me or her ever again unless its directly related to work. Are we clear or do I just need to pop your head off right here and now?"

From behind his now blue lips, I heard a gargle I took that as a yes and dropped him unceremoniously on the floor. "Good, now run along and spread the word to your little buddies not to talk about my girl like that." He nodded quickly and scurried off. I heard him mumble some thing about 'crazy boomers' as he left but I let it pass.

I know it seems a little over protective or obsessive on my part but what can I say. No one talks about my girl like that, well except me when I'm drunk. But thats not the point!

The main reason was I was using her as an anchor to my humanity. At first I had thought this would be all fun being a robot and such. But I had been wrong. It was a test everyday of trying not to go crazy. Little things you would normally take for granted where now exercises in control.

I couldn't drink from anything less then a steel cup which I had made my self after a long night of trying to enjoy a night out with Niki. After the first 2 cups had been broken at dinner I was ready to call it a night but Niki had made me stay and had got me a straw and told me just not to pick up the cup.

That had worked for about 20 minutes until I forgot and picked the cup up soaking myself again. At that point I said we should call it a night. She said she understood and would try and help me as much as she could.

That had irritated me. I didn't need help. So that night I went home and made the cup out of a small sauce pan with my fist. Niki on the other hand went out and bought me some indestructible things for my apartment. I have to admit I would have never thought about doing that.

I had just finished getting in the truck for the ride over to the disturbance when we started getting a run down on what was going on. There was some group going around targeting large corporations, stealing data, blowing up buildings, and other forms of terrorism. Who ever these people where they knew what they where doing, and I had suspected that this next case was going to involve them.

"All right people heres the run down there are a number of construction boomers attacking a small line of buildings that are owned by a private corporation. They seemed to just be causing property damage at first, but when the AD Police showed up they began attacking them. There have already been a number of deaths among the AD Police. So we got the call, and we are going in hard and fast. Heres the plan..."

What I loved most about our plans was they were almost always very straight forward. Go in, kill the bad guys, and let the AD Police clean up. Ahh... what fun. As the plan was described, and everyone got ready, I looked over to Niki who like always looked a little nervous.

I gently squeezed her shoulder and gave her a smile which she returned. "Don't worry," I told her, "this is going to be fun."

She rolled her eyes at me,"Whatever Roach, you just be careful this time."

I gave her a grin, "I'll try, but no promises you know how I get."

She rolled her eyes again and cocked her gun. A number of the other people in the Truck and I did the same.

When we got to the site and started out of the truck I got excited and began to salivate with a cocky grin. "God, I can't believe we get paid for this."

No sooner did the words escape my mouth and we were given the signal to move in and proceed with the plan.

We went in to the building that was taking the most abuse and started taking down boomers. God, how could so many be attacking at once. There had to be at least 20 of them in this building all throwing things, shooting guns they had assimilated from the AD Police, or just breaking things.

I shot one that was about to throw a statue at me. Its head flew off and the statue fell on its body. The body exploded.

'Sweet'

Just then I was hit by gun fire. The 2 officers next to me where torn to shreds. Through the cloud of gore I saw 3 shapes fly into the mix.

'Knight Sabers', I thought bitterly, 'always ruining my fun'.

I looked over and saw one of the officers that had been killed was the ass from earlier, 'man people are going to say I let that happen...crap'.

I grabbed one of the other rifles off the ground and fused it into my arm. Then, began taking shots with both my pistol in one arm and the new gun arm. The boomers were starting to go down in mass now. It was an amazing sight, not just the boomers, but how graceful the Knight Sabers were. It was almost like watching a dance.

Then I got shot again, this time right in the face. It hurt real bad, luckily there was very little a stray bullet could do to me; however, I shot one of the knight sabers when my aim flew off its target.

I heard a scream. 'Shit', I looked, it was Nene she had been hit in the side. The damage wasn't to bad but I could tell from the size of the dent that she would be sore for a few days. "MY BAD!" I yelled. This earned me a glare from not only my fellow officers but also the other 2 Knight Sabers.

Linna ran to Nene and picked her up and jumped out of the building through the hole it now had in its side.

The chaos soon began to die down as the last few boomers fell. I was able to take out the last one with a round of fire from both weapons. After it fell, I rejected the gun I had fused in to my arm. It was kind of gross my flesh had all been ripped off now all that remained was a bloody flesh sleeve and a blue robot arm. I then got hit in the side by Priss who was pissed at me for hitting Nene with a stray bullet. I grabbed her arm and threw her across the room and ran after her. The other Branch members with me stayed back watching the scene. They knew better then to get in the way of one of my fights. We ended up in a back room where I pinned her to a wall. "I said 'my bad' dammit whats wrong with you!"

She said nothing and punched me again, this time she used knuckle busters on me. God they freaking hurt like a bitch. I fell down and looked at her. "You know Priss, if you weren't such a bitch you would be able to find a man that didn't just want you for your tight ass" oops... meant to think that one.

Priss almost fell over. "shit." For a moment it looked like Priss would attack again but instead she ran. "Oh thank god, that was almost worse." _Must not kill the Knight Sabers_ was a rule I had given myself when I first saw them. I don't know how much that would affect this world, so they were off limits.

I knew though, now that I had said Priss's name, they would be coming after me. "Shit it is worse..."

When we got back to HQ, I was called in to see the chief. He had a sour look on his face. "I heard that before you went out today you had a run in with Tony." I nodded, I knew where this was going. "I also heard when he was killed he was with you." I nodded again. He looked around "Did you have an..."

I cut him off, "Sir, if I was going to kill the shit for bad mouthing me and my girl I would have done it in front of everyone with my own two hands not by letting him get shot by a boomer. There is just no sport in that."

The chief's eye twitched. It was great. I knew he couldn't do anything to me. I was too valuable to let go of. "Get the Hell out of my office Roach. If anything like this happens again I will see to it that you are taken apart and used for transplants are we clear?"

"Yeah, whatever. Anything else?"

"Yes...I thought Tony was a dick too." He winked at me and shooed me off.

I think he knew I was telling the truth. He just had to make it look like he was busting my balls for appearance sake. He was a good guy for the most part, I think he was just a little weary of me because I was a little unbalanced at times. Oh well, got to get ready for my date with Niki.

I wonder if she wants to go all the way tonight, if it is true what they say about the quiet ones, and if I can make a screamer out of her. Only time will tell.

TBC...  
Next Time: A New Purpose!

AN: Hey everyone hope you enjoyed this chapter. The next chapter will be some what dark but the humor will return with a vengeance after that! Until next time PEACE! Also you may notice that I have added some Tokyo 2040 elements to this fic. I won't be doing this very much but I do like some elements from that version and will use them as I see fit. As always C&C is welcome.


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